Yesterday I ate well, I crushed a workout at the gym, and as I looked in the mirror, I noticed my hard work paying off. I snapped a few selfies to remind myself of where I am at and to use the photos as a measurement of my progress. I was just about to upload my photo’s to social media to demonstrate my hard work and tout my results. But then I realized… why?
For what purpose?
… to get attention?
… to validate myself?
… to show off my hard work?
… to inspire others?
Yes. Yes. Yes... Hell No.
I quickly realized that showing off my own body wont directly inspire someone to change their own. I don’t need validation, I don’t need attention, and I certainly don’t need to post a picture in my sports bra and leggings.
Why?
Because my body is my body. My body is not a comparative measure of what I want others to aspire to be, and I certainly don’t want others to compare themselves to my body and shame their own simply because it doesn’t look the same. Of course these things weren’t my intention, but they are a harsh reality. The mind is a sneaky son of a gun.
Social media has plagued our thought processes and influenced our self worth and perceptions more than we could and would ever like to imagine.
I have a responsibility as a business owner, leader, and woman of integrity. It is my responsibility and privilege to lead others to health both physically and mentally. My responsibilities include educating and empowering others; not causing women to shame their own bodies, men to lust, and young females to form unhealthy ideals and thought processes that lead to dangerous and unrealistic expectations for their own bodies.
This is not okay. Yet this is what the fitness industry has become.
Fitness is not an image of someone in lingerie sporting a 6 pack.
Health is not an image of someone posing half naked on a bed.
Exercise isn’t sweating out the calories you overindulged in last night.
And a positive role model sure as hell isn’t one that makes you feel less about yourself.
So instead of posting a selfie, I am writing this to you.
To hell with the likes and the comments, and here’s a message to you instead.
You’ll never find success until you accept your flaws.
There was a period over the last year that I had given up completely on my own health, fitness, and nutrition. I found myself 15 pounds heavier than I wanted to be and I started to avoid the mirror, wearing jeans or really any pants that once fit so perfectly, and decided that I really just didn’t care. (Because when you don’t care you don’t have to admit you’re really miserable).
I kept wanting to feel better. But wanting wasn’t enough. It didn’t help me change my habits. I wanted a bed time snack more than I wanted weight loss. I wanted short term gratification more than I wanted long term success.
I’d try, and then I would do good for a few days, but nothing ever changed until I changed my thinking. One day, I woke up, and instead of avoiding the mirror, I took a good hard look.
I noticed how far I had let myself go, and I accepted it.
In fact, I said the serenity prayer right then and there.
“God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference.”
I couldn’t change the fact that I had gotten to the point that I had. But until I accepted it, nothing had changed, and nothing would change. I looked in the mirror and told myself that I couldn’t change the fact that I had gotten myself here. I couldn’t take away the pounds, inches, or the cellulite. But I could remove the guilt, the shame, and the insecurity.
In that moment, I chose acceptance, I chose responsibility, I chose freedom… I chose change.
I couldn’t change that I had gotten there… I could only change what I did from that moment forward. Every single day I had to tell myself “I can’t change the fact that I look like this in this moment, but I can change the fact that I don’t have to look like this tomorrow, or in the future”.
I made choices to move forward every single day.
I stopped filling my mind with excuses (I don’t have the time, I don’t have the energy, I deserve XY and Z, … yada-yada-yada) and started filling it with self love instead (I deserve to feel good, I deserve to fuel myself with good foods, I deserve to move my body daily, I deserve time for me and my own health).
I challenge you. What do you need to accept? What do you need to change?
Once you know what isn’t working, it’s easy to find the knowledge and the resources to make progress forward, but first we must accept where we are.
And it’s okay to be where you are! But it’s not okay to stay there if you are unhappy.
If you’re ready for change. If you’re ready for a better tomorrow, send me an email. I am happy to help!
Blessings,
Brady
